Being LGBT+ and Jewish on Rosh Hashanah

Rosh Hashanah marks the beginning of the High Holy Days, a time of reflection, renewal and coming together with our families and communities. For many of us, it is a meaningful and joyful moment in the Jewish calendar. For some LGBT+ Jews, this time of year can also bring more complicated feelings.

Going home for the Chugim isn’t equally comfortable for everyone. Spending time with family can mean navigating relatives who do not fully understand or accept someone’s LGBT+ identity, relationships that are not acknowledged in the same way as others, or difficult questions about relationships, marriage and family. For some, it may mean having to decide how much of themselves they feel able to share.

Returning to synagogue can bring similar uncertainty. The High Holy Days may be the first time someone has stepped into a Jewish communal space for a long time, particularly if they have previously felt excluded or unseen.

Being physically welcomed into a space does not necessarily mean feeling that your identity, relationships or family are fully recognised within it. Nobody should have to leave a part of themselves at the door to be included.

There is also something particularly significant about teshuvah. The High Holy Days ask us to reflect, repent and return. For LGBT+ Jews who have been told that their identity or relationships are something they should change, language about wrongdoing, repentance or becoming a “better” person can carry additional weight.

Perhaps Rosh Hashanah also gives us an opportunity to think differently about what it means to return. What if teshuvah, meaning “return”, can also be about returning to ourselves, our communities and our Judaism? What if it can mean returning more fully to who we are?

As we enter 5787, Rosh Hashanah is an opportunity for all of us to consider what genuine belonging looks like. Not simply whether LGBT+ Jews are welcomed through the doors of our communities, but whether we can participate fully, see our lives reflected and know that we belong there.

May this new year bring us closer to Jewish communities where every LGBT+ Jew can belong, participate and thrive.